How a birth plan is like designing your favourite room. from your doula ♥
With so much information out there about birth plans and what should or should not be included, how does this gratuitous information all over the interwebs resonate with you?
Should you make a birth plan? Is there even a point? Will anyone read it? And of course: Isn’t that something that only the hippie moms do?
As a mother, I will say each and every one of those questions ran through my mind. They are all valid.
As a doula, I see making a birth plan the same way I see making a room in your house absolutely the best one you can make.
A birth plan is just a plan. It includes your ideal birth, with all your ideal wishes included. A birth plan is like a design, with all the details included.
Imagine this: You want to make a room in your house that is beautifully decorated, the lighting is perfect, and it looks calm and it is cozy. It is one of those rooms that you walk into and feel like you can relax and you have everything you need.
This is an important room in your house because you have taken time to prepare it: you have included all things that make you feel good, it suits your style and most of all, it is all yours. Every part of the room, every plant and every piece of furniture speaks to who you are. This is why this room feels great.
If you are wondering where I am going with this, it’s true, it’s how I feel birth plans should be.
I think they are important. Yes, I said it and I said it for all the reasons you want to design your perfect room.
This birth only happens once. And while some of us just want to travel through it, close our eyes and hope for the best, birth has its own path, and it’s own way of working.
Being prepared for what may or may not happen, is the only way to be able to relax into your birth. We have knowledge that tells us that the more we feel safe, the more relaxed and supported we are, the easier our birth can feel. And just like that room I was referring to when I started this post, your birth plan is exactly how you want to it to be. Your style includes your values and desires, and allows you to have things unfold in a way that is unique to you and your family. Being in a place that is familiar takes the fear out of the entire process.
I think birth plans are important. Even if I am sitting with my client and talking about how they want to see things happen in their labour, I am helping them create a birth plan. When we talk about how they want to labour, what will help them relax and what foods should be included in their bag for birthing, we are talking about their “birth plan.”
I guess the other thing that is really important here is that not all plans work out as we hope. Because birth does have it’s own path and it’s own way of working, part of making a birth plan is talking about those possibilities and how to best manage them. This plan includes all the second choices should things not unfold in the ideal way.
Planning your birth is important. I don’t recommend birth plans to my clients simply because I am a doula. I recommend them so that my clients know what to expect in their birthing time. I insist on that plan so that when we are all working together, we are all on the same page: literally and metaphorically. We have designed a unique, familiar and comfortable space with which to labour and birth. Even if it is just for you, and just for us, we have outlined the ideal and value based birth for just you and your family. Get comfy, and relax into your birth knowing every part of it is planned.
Kathleen Baker, Birth Journey Doula